i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I need to wash the frat house off of me
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
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