So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Randomize