Pappa wants mamma naked
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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