i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Randomize
