And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
