i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
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