i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize