just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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