I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize