Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
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