4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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