i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
a search helicopter?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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