'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
i believe in u and ur pee
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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