So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
