you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
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