CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
areolas are like halos for boobs.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
