yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
I will be naked everywhere
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Randomize