Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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