How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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