This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
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