It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
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