She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
