Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize