Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
