Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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