Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
you never un-have a 4some
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
