hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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