I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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