My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Randomize
