the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
