would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
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I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
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Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.