Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I just want nice things and good sex
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
