3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
God I need to hump something, right now.
I love you.
Bad choice
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