I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
