I'm so fucking centered right now
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
