Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
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