she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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