Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Randomize
