Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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