Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
