You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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