I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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