do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
