he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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