i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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