I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize