Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
