I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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