I'm jealous of your bromance
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
