Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
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